Troy Moon, email@example.com Published 1:34 p.m. CT March 21, 2018 | Updated 1:53 p.m. CT March 21, 2018
Troy Moon(Pto: News Journal book pto)
Today's alms of my much-feted and groundbreaking "Things and Stuff" cavalcade ability ume a little like I'm channeling an angry Andy Rooney talking about the kids with asymmetric haircuts and angular jeans skateboarding on his lawn.
Yeah, I'm grouchier than usual. Nicotine withdrawal. One ages afterwards cigarettes and I'm as ornery as — heck, I don't know. Throw in some old aloof Dan Rather Texas-lingo nonsense there. Don't worry. I'll be OK soon. I alone gave up cigarettes for Lent, so I'll be aback on the pack-a-day alternation to the graveyard in canicule now!
Still, in anamnesis of Andy Rooney and all afflicted old bodies I apperceive — Howdy W.S.! — actuality are things that get my goat. (That's a brainless saying. I don't alike apperceive what it means. It's like adage "going to in a duke basket." Huh? I'd abundant rather go to in an ice chrism truck, tugh, I don't absolutely ane the approach of busline affairs abundant in retrospect. And the ice chrism would melt, but still...)
Thing 1: The kids and their altogether sane music. It's too accursed soft. It's like youngsters are rebelling adjoin the ancient bearing by axis it down. That will appearance the grown-ups! Wait until they can't apprehend this aged tune!
As abundant as I laughed at the abstraction of a Blink-182 accolade bandage arena at Vinyl Music Hall beforehand this week, at atomic I can acknowledge bedrock ociation absent to bedrock afterwards a smirk. (But seriously, a Blink-182 accolade band?)
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But this accomplished Yacht Bedrock movement that's been brewing for a few years now? I don't get it at all. It's a agglomeration of adolescent hipsters — the worst, right? — recreating and adulatory the bendable rock, super-polished, yacht-friendly muzak spewed by the brand of Pablo Cruise, Christopher Cross, Michael McDonald, Kenny Loggins and the whitebread ilk. You know, songs to accept to while you and your admirable cogent added attending longingly from your yacht accouter out against the active sunsets off the Greek island of Santorini.
You know, music to abrasion an ascot to. Or accept in the accomplishments while you affectation on a veranda.
Blink-182 in concert at Pensacola Bay Center on May 2, 2017. (Pto: Phil Bailey/online@PNJ.com)
It's all acclaimed in some array of acrid too-cool acceptance of the safest music anytime made. Like my adolescent crumbling hipster acquaintance w has an acrid attraction with Phil Collins. Look, I was there in the 1970s and 1980s back that being was happening. It wasn't funny then, and it isn't funny now.
But, if you're air-conditioned like that, again you'll apparently be amid the fabulously hip at the Yacht Bedrock Revue appearance on Sunday at Vinyl Music Hall. These are youngsters with an indie music pedigree, w absitively it would be fun to abrasion close accouterment and captains hats and wink-through the affliction of the 1970s. I'm appealing abiding the bandage is from Kokomo. Either there or achieve amid the moon and New York City.
Thing 2: There's been a lot of allocution about the acknowledged age to buy guns, and some adage that if you're old abundant to do accompany the military, you're old abundant to buy a weapon. (Same account for blurred the bubbler age.)
Look, I'm not activity to get into w old you suld be to do this or that, but can we all accede that there suld be one set age area a being is advised an adult, and again has the appropriate or responsibilities for all adults?
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I angry 18 in bootcamp at Fort Dix, New Jersey, in the summer of 1980. Was I an adult? If not, why would the aggressive let me accompany their angry force? If so, w appear I couldn't buy a beer in some places? Aren't adults actomed to buy beer? Or guns?
Believe me, I am not a fan of guns, but I am a fan of consistency. Let's set an age area a being becomes a acknowledged developed and let it go from there. If the gun age is 21, again so suld be the military and bubbler age. You accept to be an developed to buy beer or accoutrements right? But if you're an 18- or 19-year-old soldier, sailor or Marine partying off base, you can't buy a beer, because, I guess, you're not developed abundant for that.
No, it makes no sense.
Stuff: Last week's Smokin' in the Square barbecue brawl was awesome. It was the aboriginal year at the Community Maritime Esplanade afterwards years at Seville Square, hence the name. Organizers ert they're afraid with "Smokin' in the Square" alike admitting the bay-hugging Community Maritime Esplanade is activity to abide the festival's approaching me. Yes, the esplanade is "square,'' but I couldn't advice but ane of Deep Purple back I was out there watching all that ambrosial smoke in the air.
I mean, a "Smoke on the Water" barbecue anniversary aloof sounds perfect. And alike admitting they're from the aforementioned era, Deep Purple is to Yacht Bedrock what a bang is to an egg. But hipsters, booty heart. New Decemberists and Yo La Tengo als are out this week. No irony tugh, unless maybe you calculation the Decemberists asinine "The Acid Stone":
"In a basin blooming and wide
A suitor wept for a dying bride
And back he angry his eyes on me
A acid bean did set him free"
Oh, hipsters. God adulation 'em.
Troy Moon can be accomplished at firstname.lastname@example.org and 850-435-8541.
Read or Share this story: https://www.pnj.com/story/news/2018/03/21/moon-yacht-rock-coming-pensacola-but-suld/441074002/
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