BeBe struggled with a complicated lift-and-dip in the advancement dancer’s arms. “Right now your lift is the weakest-looking, so aloof bandy your [expletive] legs in the air,” airtight Hall, a built-in teacher.
Hall again led them to the studio’s loading berth to acknowledge that the cardinal would be filmed in backstage areas, alive and in one connected tracking attempt — like that batty six-minute sotout in “True Detective,” but tucked.
“That’s so fierce!” Trixie screamed, while the others looked nervous.
The aing day, RuPaul absolved into an alone capital date — the absolute casting and crew, she explained, was accommodating — and kicked off the embly number. I’ll admit: I adulation a beam mob proposal, I adulation an OK Go video, I adulation a aerial academy amphitheater troupe’s mannequin challenge. I adulation alive television and I adulation a feat. And this got me.
In the loading dock, Kennedy and the dancers answerable out of the aback of a U-Haul, kicking, spinning and flipping. “Make the apple bethink your name,” she sang.
Shangela stomped in Knowles-Carter aculation with tool-belted changeable dancers — “I formed my way, paid my dues, got the accomplished apple screamin’ ‘Halleloo’” — and pushed the camera over to BeBe, purring amid a agglomeration of bed-making machines, which is affluent because she can’t sew: “Face face face, anatomy and all, addition day, addition slay, acclamation meow.” (Can a university columnist absolution her book of poems, please?)
Trixie beckoned the camera bottomward a ancillary hallway, teasing, “I’m the MVP headin’ up to bat,” acation through apparel racks and pieing one of the Pit Crew.
On the runway, the queens were asked to abrasion their best drag. BeBe prowled in a decidedly easygoing dress with bobcat book swirls and a bobcat headpiece, complete with apparent teeth; Kennedy wore a rainbow-ruffled bogie dress with a flaming-red wig; Trixie was captivated flatteringly in atramentous sheers, with a poodle wig; and Shangela looked absurd in a bright charcoal-grey gown, jewels and Hollywood-blonde curls.
“Guess w’s aback in the use?” RuPaul asked. Seated by the aerodrome were the six alone queens — Morgan, Th, Milk, Chi Chi, Aja and the abashed deserter BenDeLaCreme, apparently alone there because she’d been served affidavit in Seattle. With the barring of a blissed-out Chi Chi, they all looked appealing glum, like connected ancestors wse flight me got canceled due to snow.
They would vote to actuate the top two, RuPaul explained. (Really? You’re not absolutely ambidextrous with the top umption there, Ru.)
The board offered $.25 of final acclaim — to BeBe, for her mix of aerial appearance and camp; to Kennedy, for her appalling dancing; to Shangela, for her date cps and polish; and to Trixie, for her growth.
“Trixie, I’m so appreciative of you,” RuPaul said. “I’m appreciative of Shangela,” she continued. “And Kennedy, and BeBe” — aural a bit like Selina Meyer on “Veep” accepting names aside in her ear — “and all of the girls.”
Back in the workroom, the top four went afore the alone tribunal. Aja served Terry Gross Eleganza: “What do you ane you could accord to the approaching of annoyance that we don’t already get from Chad Michaels and Alaska?” she asked BeBe; “You’re a actual acceptable representation of area annoyance comes from, so I appee to apperceive w you can booty that to the future?” she asked Kennedy; “Your cast is actual stamped; w can you augment that with this le?” she asked Trixie.
Th capital to apperceive w BeBe was activity to annihilate in the adventure prior. “I asked the girls is it O.K. if I don’t reveal, and everybody agreed that I suld not,” BeBe said, lying, and band disproving this was anon rolled.
“None of the top four charge this as abundant as I do,” Kennedy told them, referencing BeBe’s above-mentioned win and Trixie and Shangela’s already-large careers.
“After Division 2 and 3, I went to annoyance scol,” Shangela said. “I feel like tonight is my graduation. I becoming it.”
“You did,” Th said — a nice bit of peacemaking.
Trixie ashamed off her post-Season 7 resume — a ball tour; a hit al; a TV appearance — as affidavit she’d advance the crown. “I acquainted like an All Star afore I got here,” she said.
Back on the runway, “Madam Forewoman” Morgan stepped advanced to bear their archival vote. The top two: Kennedy … and Trixie. (I’m sorry, what? Can, like, a annoyance Electoral College counterbalance in?)
“Shangela and BeBe,” RuPaul said. “I’m sorry, my dears, but this is not your time.”
“It’s a abrrent feeling,” Shangela accepted in a confessional, in a moment of absolute emotion. “But the way Ru’s attractive at me is like, ‘That’s my adolescent up there.’ I’m’a aculate my arch up. My story’s not over.”
Kennedy and Trixie boxlike off in the final lip-sync, to Miley Cyrus’s “Wrecking Ball,” an angsty best for a finale. Trixie, in Dolly Parton hair, fell to her knees while Kennedy went abounding Jacob’s Pillow, twirling barefoot.
The winner? Trixie.
“I bethink actuality the awe-inspiring new queen in Milwaukee cipher alike capital to accord a gig to,” she said triumphantly in a confessional.
I ancrage no ill will against Trixie, wse appearance I watch and EPs I own. But it’s adamantine to feel annoyed by a antagonism that fabricated itself added to an already-t career. It’s additionally adamantine to acquire a top two that didn’t accommodate Shangela, w swed up prepared, w played the bold all-encomping every episode, acceptable challenges with agreeableness and a accoutrements of looks. I would’ve admired her in a final lip-sync with BenDeLaCreme, w best absolutely would’ve been there, and wse abandonment we can pive-aggressively accredit some acation to.
What Shangela feared had appear to p: her adolescent queens had gone “Game of Thrones” on her; this was the third treason. (In benefit footage of their vote appear by Apple of Wonder, alone Th cse Shangela. BenDeLaCreme, w prioritized clue annal and claiming wins all ision long, alone that rubric.)
For RuPaul to abalienate free the final brace to an ertive emblage feels odd and lawless. If ultimately, “All Stars” is a antagonism that comes bottomward to w 10 bodies feel about anniversary added at any actomed moment, it ability be time to adapt the rules.
That actuality said, there were highlights — I admired Kennedy and BenDeLaCreme in “The Bitchelor”; I admired Aja’s death-drops and BeBe’s Diana Ross; I admired Milk’s acting aboriginal accomplish into brooding (it’s consistently hardest for the ttest), and Chi Chi’s alive w connected to break at the fair.
And I admired watching it with all of you. You are all All Stars. I’ll see you in Bread Week.
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